"H ow The Left Stole Reading" A Dr. Seuss Parody
Happy Birthday to the late, beloved children’s writer, Dr. Seuss! Actually, his birthday was Tuesday, March 2, which in 1998 was dubbed in his honor “Read Across America Day.”
So, you’d think this would have been a good day for the memory of Dr. Seuss, author of HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS, THE CAT IN THE HAT, GREEN EGGS AND HAM, HORTON HEARS A WHO! and other classics. In stories like THE SNEETCHES, he directly addressed social issues such as racism and tolerance at a time when these concepts were largely ignored, emphasizing to children how, deep down, we as human beings transcend superficial differences.
However, he didn’t address racism in exactly the way “anti-racists” in 2021 say he should have. To leftists who are always moving the goal posts, Dr. Seuss wasn't "woke" enough and didn’t go far enough, offering only a general message of acceptance when he should have gone on to address “structural power imbalances.” And some of his drawings intended to suggest different ethnicities are interpreted as racist today, because of their exaggeration of some physical characteristics. This started with an accusation by the Southern Poverty Law Center, which condemned him for signs of “anti-Orientalism” and “anti-blackness.”
Dr. Seuss cannot defend himself, being, after all, dead. But anyone with half a brain –- this excludes most leftists, I realize –- who has read his books should know how he felt about race and see that this modern depiction of him is wrong. He wanted to show the absurdity of racism. Doesn’t matter –- Dr. Seuss was dis-honored and essentially canceled by President Biden on...yes, his birthday. His name was literally written out of the proclamation for this year’s “Read Across America Day.” And Dr. Seuss Business Enterprises, the business dedicated to preserving and protecting the author’s legacy, announced it would pull six of his books from publication due to “allegedly racist and insensitive imagery.” Details at the link.
Standards certainly do change; it was just six years ago that then-First Lady Michelle Obama participated in a Dr. Seuss reading with a roomful of kids in “Cat In The Hat” hats. Even President Obama, in a live appearance, cited the story THE SNEETCHES as one way to learn about racism and treating each other the same. Both Obamas have heaped praise on Dr. Seuss.
Ah, but now, in this age of “anti-racism,” we’re not supposed to treat each other the same.
If Dr. Seuss were still with us, he might agree that some of his artwork from decades ago seems stereotypical or unflattering today, and he might even want to revise them. Who knows? But he isn’t here. There has to be a way to treat classic books, such as these and others like Mark Twain’s masterpiece HUCKLEBERRY FINN, so that young people will see them in the context of their times and understand their intended messages AGAINST racism. But don’t expect public schools to do it.
If you want to see how twisted the racial messages to children have become, take a look at this story about a new Cartoon Network public service announcement.
Dr. Seuss never could have anticipated how leftists in the 2020s are trying to force change in our culture.
Never one to let a good parody opportunity go to waste, I decided to write one in honor of Dr. Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel), who would have been 117 on Tuesday, March 2.
HOW THE LEFT STOLE READING
(a parody of HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS)
by Laura Ainsworth
Every kid down in Kidville liked reading a LOT
But the Left, who controlled education, did NOT!
They wouldn’t say why, but we all know one reason:
To read the wrong book means you’re guilty of treason
They also just hated the folks on the Right
They said we’re oppressors –- at least, if we’re white
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that their brains were two sizes too small
Whatever the reason, their brains or their hate
They canceled the books that they deemed out of date
They stared at the kids from their ivory tower
While focusing all of their brainwashing power
“We can’t let them read Dr. Seuss!” they’d exclaim
We have to get started erasing his name
We’ll target six books with some troublesome art
While keeping in mind that it’s only the start
“Kids LOVE Dr. Seuss!” said the folks on the Right
They knew they were facing a censorship fight
“He taught children how to be loving and kind
And how they could grow up to be ‘color-blind’”
“Color-blind??!” screamed the left, their eyes practically bleeding
We MUST find a way to keep children from reading!
To think, the un-wokeness their minds could retain
They’re reading the Bible! They’re reading Mark Twain!
“And old Dr. Seuss, he’s the worst of the lot
If kids want to read him, we’ll say they must NOT!
We’ll say he’s a bigot and lacks credibility
And give all the children that book WHITE FRAGILITY
“We’ll find all the books that aren’t focused on race
And gather them up, and we’ll hide them someplace
We’ll substitute books that reflect our obsession
With transgender studies and racial oppression
The kids down in Kidville would all cry boo-hoo
When they found out what leftists decided to do
The fun books were gone, and they felt really sad
The white kids were taught they deserve to feel bad
But parents arose, they had had quite enough
They fought for their kids, and it got pretty rough
They went to the School Board, and all had their say
And their courage and heart grew three sizes that day!
They brought back the books that the left had rejected
And made sure that freedom of speech was protected
The books were all safe and were put to good use
And we, ourselves, honor the ones...by...Dr. Seuss!
One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. -- Plato (429-347 BC)
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